Do you want to understand the needs that motivate all people so you can resolve conflicts and enjoy vibrant relationships at work and at home?
Professionals, like everyone, find themselves between a rock and hard place when they need to address a conflict but their strategies lead to defensive and rebellious responses.
Are your only options to leave the problem unresolved or to make it worse?
Not when you work with me! I teach groups of professionals and emerging professionals how to work towards the needs of all parties in a conflict so that you can make real progress towards cooperation and cohesion.
I bring groups insights they can use from my experience teaching conflict resolution in settings both inside and outside the corporate world such as: businesses, faith communities, youth programs, and colleges.
Join me for a life-changing and eye-opening conversation, and learn how to escape unnecessary power struggles by empowering yourself and others at the same time!
Marshall Bolin is a speaker and conflict coach. He started his career in conflict resolution education with a focus on helping youth avoid getting caught up in the criminal court system.
As a result of years of helping youth and their families understand each other, he discovered that others could benefit from learning these same principles of communication and conflict resolution. Combined with his expertise and desire to help, he took to the stage with the goal of reaching as many people as possible in the realm communicating about conflict. Today, his talks will bring fresh insights and useful skills to those wanting to understand the nuts and bolts of conflict resolution.
Bolin is a highly sought after speaker and consultant. His keynotes and workshops are favorites among established and emerging professionals and have inspired thousands to build bridges across differences and enjoy mutually-empowering relationships at work and home.
If you are looking for someone to transform your understanding of conflict and help you be effective without inviting pushback, Marshall is the answer for your next event.
The Anatomy of Conflict
Have you ever been in an argument that seemed totally impossible to overcome? Had a tense conversation with someone, resulting in what feels like a slow-motion train wreck of a relationship? Sometimes it feels like we’re just screaming into the void with certain people. And when neither person is accurately heard, conflict is bound to happen. Egos bruised, the hearing aid battery is dead, and the stress is a huge pain in the neck. Ouch.
The wild thing is that nearly all our conflicts arise due to four key factors. Most of us were taught to communicate in a confusing and unclear sort of way- which is great if you’re trying to ruin relationships (RIP). It’s a chronic issue that starts off small and gets worse over time. Nobody is telepathic (at least not yet), so isn’t it a good idea to do our best to express ourselves clearly? When the surgeon asks for a scalpel they are not expecting a jackhammer!
That’s why triage is so important— we’ve got to start by assessing how, where and why the damage occurred. Let’s do some communication surgery and find out which of the four things lies at the heart of your conflict. When we can name the problem we have a better chance of using the right medicine.
The Nuts and Bolts of Loving Your Enemies
Jesus told us to love our enemies. Sounds good, boss! The thing is…this is actually a pretty radical message that isn’t often practiced in our world. Turns out it’s not so easy to follow in those footsteps (they are big sandals to fill).
Say you did want to practice it though- would you know how?
How can you follow the Golden Rule with people who aren’t doing the same for you? How can you offer grace to those you disagree with, without compromising your own values?
In this poignant and timely talk, we’ll look at tried-and-true conflict resolution principles and the relevance they have for people of faith. If you want to go beyond preaching to the choir and address differences in a meaningful and powerful way, book this presentation now.
Making Peace with Emotions
Every day we navigate the challenging territory of resolving and preventing conflicts with the people in our lives. But sometimes we need to make peace with ourselves, too.
Many of the same things that help- and don’t help- to resolve friction with others also applies to how we talk to ourselves. Just like a seasonal shift in the weather, our emotional landscapes can be filled with harsh conditions. When we grasp tightly to a perfect ideal temperature, we are excluding the possibility of change- and holding the weather to a very impossible standard! That’s what it is like to expect perfection of ourselves at all times…impossible.
It is empowering to accept the fluctuations of one’s emotions, from gentle summer breeze to frosty chill. Rather than being at odds with each other, these two extremes actually provide a benefit to better knowing ourselves. Rather than what often feels like being “at war” with oneself, these hot and cold emotional experiences need resolution rather than one extreme “winning” over the other.
Emotional health is more a process of hearing the needs behind your feelings, rather than trying to force yourself to feel one particular way over another. You don’t need to fight yourself…you just need to learn how to listen.
Hans Gustafson, Director, Jay Philip Center for Interreligious Studies, University of St. Thomas
“Marshall’s inviting approach provides a direct and accessible introduction to healthy communicating tools that can be readily applied by anyone in all contexts that involve conflict, large and small. The skills offered by his approach are essential for flourishing leaders, communities, families, and friends of all ages and backgrounds. The university students in my courses working to enhance their communication skills for leadership and success in increasingly diverse societies consistently respond positively to Marshall’s trainings and suggest he be invited to future courses.”
Steven Douglas, Associate Pastor, Bethel Baptist Church, co-host of the In Good Will podcast
“I recommend Marshall to any church organization that wants to grow connecting people or overcoming disagreements equitably.”
Andy Acker, Zen priest, Stanford University
“Marshall somehow creates ease even in heated environments. I’m not sure if this is more due to skill, his nature, or both, but I’m convinced it’s both.”
“Marshall and I met as volunteers in a Restorative Justice program. We became friends out of a common passion for influencing alternative and nonviolent transformation of systems needing the compassionate touch of the human heart and soul. I value Marshall’s intentions, skills and commitment to teaching and practicing life affirming ways of communicating. He is a person whose contributions will make a difference in your life, as they have in mine."
Jean Lauer, Heartwisdom Center for Compassionate Consciousness